Football Stasisblog (2010-11-06)

My mouth is cut up, I don't feel like working, and there's football on. I don't have a fancy liveblog applet to embed, so instead, I'll just edit this list throughout the day as stuff happens (all times CDT, and probably a few minutes off due to my computer's clock being fast):

11:43 AM

• The MSU game is not on any of the Comcast stations in my service group, not even the premium channels that I don't get. I checked. Curse you, Purdue, and your geographic proximity to Chicago.
• From what I can hear on the radio, MSU has been playing a pretty mediocre game. It's good to hear Baker getting something done, though.
• Michigan/Illinois has been a battle of derps so far. Illinois coverage fail → Denard Robinson screen pass over two guys fail → Illinois rushing ball control fail. I see that Illinois scored just now, so presumably, Michigan did something wrong since I last checked.
• No, Wisconsin, you're supposed to win your remaining games to send us to the Rose Bowl. Do you really want to lose to Purdue just to spite us? Seriously, Purdue? This year? Have you considered the implications for your BCS standings? You're taking yourselves down with us...

11:45 AM

• Nice stop, MSU.

11:52 AM

• Aaaand Illinois scores just after the commercial break, while I was editing an earlier entry. Nice.
• I've heard it said that if you give a quarterback enough time to throw, he'll eventually find an open receiver and burn your defense. Michigan's 2-point-conversion defense is not doing much to prove that assertion wrong.

12:01 PM

• If opposing defenses have as much trouble as it looks like Illinois does with covering the Wolverines on every play, Rich Rod might as well have his team go for it on every fourth down.
• Looking back over that drive, it's amazing how many of Michigan's offensive plays look either unstoppable or flat-out incompetent, without anything in between. When the offensive line succeeds in opening a hole, the backs can gain 10-20 yards regularly. Denard Robinson occasionally manages to throw a nice 20-yard pace, and the receivers can sprint pretty well once they have the ball. On the other hand, I've seen two inexcusable drops in this game from Michigan's receivers, one terrible decision from Robinson (the aforementioned screen pass), and one decision that was probably poor (trying to scramble into a wall of two or three defenders — though he genuinely may not have had any receivers open, it's hard to tell on TV). They would probably be bowl-eligible in spite of their defense if their offense could be brilliant consistently. Maybe that's asking too much.

12:02 PM

• Okay, maybe Michigan's defense really is that much of a liability. I can't praise their offense without their defense letting a touchdown go by while I'm typing.

12:05 PM

• Nearly a nice stop, Gophers.

12:12 PM

• Jim Miller just said, "laxadaisical." I haven't decided yet if I'm going to forgive him.

12:15 PM

• MSU's defense has been a lot better since the first Minnesota drive. Admittedly, Minnesota's inability to start plays on time has been helping.

12:17 PM

• Great pass from Robinson to Roundtree, but that was probably the worst stiffarm I've seen. Roundtree even had to slow down and turn around to deliver it.

12:22 PM

• Wisconsin's about to go into the half losing to Purdue? Oh, dear. I hope Purdue gets tired.

12:29 PM

• Junior Hemingway just dodged three defenders despite being backed up against the sideline. How did we not score more points against Illinois?
• I wonder if MSU is going to start putting pads on the cement wall that surrounds the field. I hope Dell recovers during the bye week. I think that with the lead we have, we can keep the lead over Minnesota without Dell, but Wisconsin's performance today is making me wonder if Purdue could turn into a trap game.
• I wonder if WJR is going to have to pay royalties for the 10-second clip of "Satisfaction" that the stadium mics just picked up.

1:12 PM

• Okay, Wisconsin is up 20-10 now. That's more like it.

1:23 PM

• "Laxadaisical," again.

1:28 PM

• Officials call timeout to figure out which down it is.

1:30 PM

• I didn't realize that an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty between plays moves the down marker in addition to the line of scrimmage.

1:39 PM

• Michigan's kicking woes continue. I wasn't kidding when I said that they should go for it on every fourth down. Maybe they can punt once in a while, but with their defense, they're probably better off giving up great field position and getting their offense back on the field in a couple minutes rather than hoping for a stop.

1:42 PM

• Mikel Leshoure wiiiiiide open.

1:47 PM

• Hmm, Forcier is in. I haven't had the TV's sound on because I'm listening to the MSU game. I wonder if Robinson got hurt or if Rich Rod just felt like sitting him.
• Forcier gives up the ball on the same play where I noticed that he was in the game.
• Ugh. Cousins picked. I was hoping we'd avoid that today.

1:52 PM

• It looks like the Illinois-Michigan game will be won by the team that can hold the ball last without turning it over. Illinois has the momentum.
• It appears that MSU may have lost its shutout for the day. Oh, well. I think the defense has done a better job than the offense today regardless.

1:55 PM

• Baylor is getting thrashed by OK State. Poor Dr. O.

1:59 PM

• Robinson's long pass bounces off Hemingway's head. That's pretty funny.
• Wisconsin now winning 1,000,000-13.

2:10 PM

• New proposed offensive strategy for MSU: use the rest of the offense to draw attention away from Edwin Baker.
• That would've been a big fourth down for Illinois if they hadn't taken a delay of game penalty. Oops...

2:13 PM

• Indiana did not quite manage to knock off Iowa. I hope Iowa has enough energy left to beat Ohio State for us next week.

2:25 PM

• I was wrong. Illinois actually had to punt.

2:27 PM

• ...and Michigan turns the ball over less than a minute after getting it. I smell overtime, unless Michigan's defense decides to overachieve at underachieving.
• Baker didn't quite make it to 200 yards, but I'll take the win.

2:36 PM

• Illinois just used their only overtime timeout on their first offensive possession. What?

2:39 PM

• Holy cow, Illinois-Michigan has become a compelling game.

2:44 PM

• Mikel Leshoure wide open again, on the same play.
• Illinois PAT team rushed on in a hurry. I wonder if there was uncertainty about whether to go for two.

2:46 PM

• Forcier throws the ball at a defender; Hemingway catches it anyway.
• I'm actually getting tired of watching people score touchdowns. I wonder what's happening in the Penn State game...

2:50 PM

• Illinois moves Michigan three quarters of the distance to the goal. Ugh.

2:52 PM

• Forcier just tried to jump over the pile on the goal line and bounced off. I hope that makes YouTube.
• Shaw scores a touchdown on the next play. Michigan converts. Can Illinois keep this going? I'm not sure.

2:57 PM

• Michigan wins on a defensive stop. Wow. If they can beat Purdue next week, they might even make it to a bowl outside Detroit.

3:01 PM

• I'm gettin' TCU-Utah on channel 418! I have to make a trip to the grocery store, however. I am running low on food that can be eaten with sutures in one's mouth.

3:15 PM

• ...I did stick around long enough to see Northwestern pick up a fumble and miss a kick, however. I am happy to see them winning because, for some irrational reason, I like Northwestern more than Penn State. It'll probably be better for MSU BCS-wise if we can beat PSU while they're on a hot streak, though. There's still an excellent chance that the BCS standings will decide which team attends the Rose Bowl.

4:08 PM

• I am back from the store. It doesn't look like I had any reason to rejoice about getting the TCU-Utah game. Utah is demonstrating why TCU has been consistently ahead of them in the polls this year.
• Regardless of whether it would benefit MSU more for NU or PSU to win this game, it doesn't look like PSU has much of a chance at this point. I know that MSU at least has a proven ability to overcome yawning deficits against NU, but I don't think PSU is going to put up 21 in the second half.

4:11 PM

• Joe Paterno just used up his last timeout of the half after getting a first down, with 18 seconds left. Didn't he read about the Iowa-Wisconsin game at all?
• McGloin partially redeems his coach by throwing to a receiver who actually could make it out of bounds.

4:18 PM

• Excuse me. Unless NU runs back the kickoff, PSU will have cut the deficit to 21-7 going into the half.

4:32 PM

• I tired of ABC's halftime show and flipped back to CBSCS. The first thing I saw was TCU pick off a pass. The second thing I saw was the player who caught the ball trying to dodge three Utah players as the announcer said, "Open field in front of him."
• TCU now up 5,700,000,000-0.

4:40 PM

• I know it was kind of a long kick, but LSU's attempt just now may be the widest field goal miss that I have ever seen.

4:42 PM

• Washington-Oregon is close and it's not the first five minutes of the game. What's going on?
• While I was typing that, Oregon returned a kickoff back to the Washington 5. Hmm.

4:44 PM

• Okay, it's not really close anymore.

4:54 PM

• Well, I'll be. The NU-PSU game has become very interesting.

5:14 PM

• While I was up stuffing things into a blender, PSU tied the game. Now it looks like NU may let them score again. NU really needs to work on their pass defense technique. Grabbing the receiver's arm doesn't seem to be working for them.

5:16 PM

• PSU is now up by a touchdown. Did they make a halftime coaching adjustment? Is NU's conditioning really so bad that it could be responsible? I don't understand how you can let a team put up 28 straight points on you after you just put 21 straight up on them.

5:24 PM

• Shoving the receiver as the ball approaches doesn't seem to be working for NU, either.

5:27 PM

• Beautiful sack for LSU just now. Alabama's loss to South Carolina does not look like a one-time fluke to me. They are definitely not the same team that dominated Texas last year.

5:30 PM

• Alabama's punt bounces off the LSU returner's foot. Alabama nearly recovers. What a nightmare it would've been for that returner if Alabama had succeeded.

5:34 PM

• While I was watching the LSU-Alabama game, PSU scored another touchdown. I'm not sure this game is interesting anymore.

5:41 PM

• Les Miles had his back run directly at the Alabama offensive line three times in a row and it actually worked. I'd normally expect the coach to mix it up and try to pass to the outside or something, but whatever.

5:47 PM

• Alabama is now down 7 with 8-ish minutes left to go. My #1 reason for wanting them to lose is now that I really don't think they deserve their high spot in the BCS standings and I don't want them to move up after Utah's loss. For the record, the #2 reason is that havoc in the SEC makes it more likely for a Big Ten team to get an at-large BCS bid. The #3 reason is the Saban thing.

5:48 PM

• McElroy just had the ball knocked away. I may get my wish. Also, there was a chin strap lying on the ground next to the spot of the fumble and nobody seems interested in the question of how it got there.

5:54 PM

• Dan Persa just got sacked inside the 1-yard line. I was about to say that it would hurt Northwestern's chances of a recovery, but he scrambled for a first down on the following play, so maybe not.

6:03 PM

• Okay, I'm not going to say anything about games being over anymore. NU didn't score at all after I said it. That's scary, even knowing that I have no influence on the game.
• Congratulations, Mr. Paterno, you have now been coaching for a really long time.

6:07 PM

• I've seen a couple players today, in various games, with their mouthguards resting on top of their facemasks. They know those that those guards have to go back into their mouths at some point, right?

6:09 PM

• Julio Jones derps a first down pass. 13 seconds to go...

6:10 PM

• McElroy throws the ball at everybody; nobody catches it. 4 seconds to go...

6:14 PM

• Nick Saban tried Hook-and-Lateral! But it didn't work very well...
• Also, that was a pretty lame hook-and-lateral. One Alabama receiver actually stopped running to hand the ball to another player who was standing nearby. I don't think it fooled anybody.
• Les Miles is loud.

6:15 PM

• There is more football on, but I can't stand watching anymore. I'm gonna go make some dinner or something. Maybe I'll flip the Stanford game on near the end to see how it went.

10:13 PM

• Last edit of the day!
• Stanford is not going to lose to Arizona. They will likely get an at-large BCS bid if they continue to play as well as they are.
• Fortunately, it looks like the Big 12 won't get an at-large bid. Oklahoma lost to Texas A&M (who has three losses and is out of the BCS hunt). Missouri is in the process of losing to Texas Tech (four losses; out). If Missouri does lose, that would leave only Nebraska with one loss in the North and Oklahoma State in the South. I don't think either of those two teams has been impressive enough to justify a BCS trip with two losses, and someone has to lose the Big 12 championship game. I think many people have been assuming that the Big Televen would send an at-large team already, but I'd say the bid is definitely ours to lose after today.