King of the Microphone #2

Today, my two pieces of junk mail from Chase Bank were nearly identical. Two differences stood out:

• One letter and envelope had darker blue ink than the other.
• The interest rate on one of the offers was four percentage points higher.

For reals.

Cats eat birds

Roflroflroflroflroflroflroflrofl.

Also, lololololololololololololololololol.

I'm probably going to end up rambling about football all day anyway

I was surprised to learn that Kirk Herbstreit has four kids.

I don't think I can afford to ramble about football all day today

Two sides of a sign seen during College Gameday in Columbus:

SEC IS SLOW

---

TERRELL PRYOR TAKES CELL TECH

This ain't no poker game!

Don't look at me, I just know stuff.

Football Stasisblog (2010-11-06)

My mouth is cut up, I don't feel like working, and there's football on. I don't have a fancy liveblog applet to embed, so instead, I'll just edit this list throughout the day as stuff happens (all times CDT, and probably a few minutes off due to my computer's clock being fast):

11:43 AM

• The MSU game is not on any of the Comcast stations in my service group, not even the premium channels that I don't get. I checked. Curse you, Purdue, and your geographic proximity to Chicago.
• From what I can hear on the radio, MSU has been playing a pretty mediocre game. It's good to hear Baker getting something done, though.
• Michigan/Illinois has been a battle of derps so far. Illinois coverage fail → Denard Robinson screen pass over two guys fail → Illinois rushing ball control fail. I see that Illinois scored just now, so presumably, Michigan did something wrong since I last checked.
• No, Wisconsin, you're supposed to win your remaining games to send us to the Rose Bowl. Do you really want to lose to Purdue just to spite us? Seriously, Purdue? This year? Have you considered the implications for your BCS standings? You're taking yourselves down with us...

I cannot put my finger on it now

When you find yourself recovering from minor periodontal surgery, 800mg of ibuprofen really hits the spot.

From the inbox #2

I had MSU student football tickets a couple years ago. Since then, I have received one or two short e-mails from the athletics office before every football game. Most of the e-mails are attempts to convince me to buy more tickets. I keep telling myself that I should unsubscribe, but I haven't bothered yet.

Today, I got this:

SPARTAN FANS RAISE YOUR SHIELD

Spartan Sportsmanship embodies the DIGNITY and respect that comes with being a Spartan.

- 81% of MSU Fans in the stands attend games without being intoxicated
- 82% of MSU Fans in the stands dispose of the trash they brought into parking or tailgate areas
- 97% of MSU Fans in the stands think it is acceptable for coaches and players to shake hands with their opponents after the game.


That's right: nearly one in five MSU fans comes to games hammered and/or leaves crap lying around. Plus, there are about a couple thousand people at every game who consider it unacceptable for opposing teams to shake hands with each other.

I'm glad the MSU athletics office is here to remind me from what a classy institution I received both of my degrees.

Unsubscribering...